Every restaurant in Moncton now closed, according to reports

Every restaurant in Moncton now closed, according to reports

Moncton — After a rash of restaurant closures in Moncton, reports are coming in that there is now nowhere left to dine out in the city, causing a panic among the thousands of residents who cannot cook for themselves.

Greater Moncton has seen several restaurants close up shop recently, including Indian restaurant Asian Garden on Mountain Road, Delightfully Delicious Sushi on Main Street, La Louche on St. George Street and Chan’s House in Dieppe. Add to that the tragic fire that destroyed Dolma Food and flooding that closed St. James’ Gate downtown, and residents are beginning to panic over a lack of food options.

“I was just getting over Pisces closing in the fall,” said Moncton foodie Genevieve Landry. “It seems every time I find a new place I like, it just ends up closing.”

Local restaurant reviewers the Two Fat Guys, whose write-ups can be seen regularly in Moncton’s daily newspaper the Times & Transcript, also expressed dismay at the recent closures.

“Smaller cities like Moncton need a culinary landscape to help foster a sense of community,” according to one of the anonymous Fat Guys, reached via email. “Small, independent restaurants help develop the cultural spirit of a city, and help give really terrible food reviewers like ourselves jobs. Have you read the stuff we write about restaurants? It’s terrible. We could never find work anywhere else.”

Out on the town, the lack of dining options is apparent. Residents walk past boarded-up shops, opting instead to line up in droves at the nearest Tim Hortons, the only remaining option for people with no food at home and no skills in the kitchen with which to make even the simplest of meals.

“I’m forced to have my breakfast, lunch and dinner at Tims every day now,” says Reggie LeBlanc. “I don’t do groceries or have any sense of what food is supposed to cost, so I really don’t mind paying $17 for a little bun with a slice of ham in it and a cup of dirty dishwater coffee.”

When asked what the City of Moncton is doing to reinvigorate the city, a spokesperson said steps were being taken to bring in a number of large American food chains to the North-West End, in the hopes of making Moncton exactly like every small city in the United States.

  1. Hilarious – especially the Two Fat guys comment!

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  2. You’re awesomely awesome !! 🙂

    Reply
  3. Love the irony, but please see Blue Olive, Kanpai, Les Brumes du Coude, Cinta Ria…Moncton is doing just fine dining wise.

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