Saint John — While the temperatures are cold, the tempers were flaring today at the Saint John City Market.
Sixty-three-year-old market patron Dave LeBlanc was suddenly and viciously attacked by a bystander while he was repeatedly asking strangers if it was “cold enough for [them]?”
“I was just shopping for some beard oil in the market,” said LeBlanc. “I like to socialize when I’m out and about, you know, and I’m a huge kidder. So, I was joking around asking folks if they minded the cold weather when somebody just started whaling on me. I haven’t been that surprised since all of those baseball players admitted to taking steroids!”
Market shopkeepers cared for the injured man while 911 was called. An ambulance arrived shortly thereafter and was about to transport LeBlanc to hospital, when he asked one of the paramedics if it was cold enough for him. The paramedic’s eye twitched, then he silently walked away, got into the ambulance and left the scene without LeBlanc.
The confessed assailant surrendered to police without a struggle. “I honestly don’t know what came over me,” confessed 70-year-old Hazel White. “I had just spent 10 minutes walking over from the Admiral Beatty in that bitter wind. I was getting the feeling back in my face and fingers, when I heard him ask if it was ‘cold enough for ya’ for the fifth time in 2 minutes. The news has been so depressing lately… now this weather. I think I just snapped.”
Once the Saint John Police constable heard what instigated the attack, White was released without charges. The officer in question also sucker-punched LeBlanc while exiting the premises.