Dear everyone,
I hope this message finds you well, and well-rested because you had an extra hour of sleep this weekend! This is simply a friendly reminder about the annual time-change: if you haven’t already, do take a minute to set back all your clocks and alarms.
Certainly, I realize that a reminder about daylight saving time is not necessarily the most welcome news, as I am sure that many of you are already having trouble coping with the shorter and colder days as the seasons change.
Ultimately, my response to this is as follows: Fuck you, I’m setting at 5 p.m. now! I’m tired of watching your sorry asses sulk about your pitiful lives day-in and day-out, and to say the least, I’m super excited that I won’t be seeing nearly as much of it for the foreseeable future.
Hopefully having nice, sunny days wasn’t the only thing in your life that was bringing you some semblance of happiness!
See you never,
The Sun