Fredericton — Brian Gallant was positively beaming with pride this morning as he showcased his brand-new homemade cabinet that’s “bigger and better than anything any other New Brunswick premier has ever thrown together.”
The premier said when he checked his weather app on Friday afternoon, he realized he’d have to cancel his plans to hit up Killarney Lake Beach to work on his tan. “I was moping around the house on Saturday, because it was sort of rainy out and I was pretty bored,” said Gallant, applying unused suntan oil to one of his cabinet’s cupboard hinges. “So I turned on Property Brothers and that’s when it hit me — I could totally build my own cabinet!”
Gallant went on to explain that John and Drew Scott, HGTV’s “Property Brothers,” always say that a home’s value can be greatly improved with a few simple renovations. “So I figured, if these guys can do it, why not me? I’m better looking than they are and just as handy — I’m just hoping this new actual cabinet doesn’t fall apart like my old one.”
Gallant said he then hastily drove to Home Depot, where a kindly older man in an orange apron helped him find the items he’d need to complete the task by Monday.
“Yeah, he kept making jokes about being the ‘Property Premier’ or something,’ said Ken Ramsay, Home Depot employee. “He evidently had no idea how to build a cabinet — I had to pretty well draw up a step-by-step guide and put all the appropriate tools in his cart.”
When Gallant began constructing the cabinet in his garage, he quickly realized it would be harder than the Property Brothers made it look; so, he called up some local MLAs and forced them to come over and finish the job.
“It’s my very first DIY project and, I have to say, it went well considering I haven’t built anything since that jewelry box I made for my mom in Grade 7,” he went on, pretending he’d had no help with the project. “Just call me Brian ‘Do-It-Yourself’ Gallant!
“Sometimes people call me a tool,” concluded the premier. “Well, I’m not a tool, but I think this proves that I sure do know my way around one.”