Subzero temperatures to hold steady in NB until 2016

Saint John — Climatologists at the Maritime Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (MOAA) are warning that average daily temperatures may remain below the freezing point in Eastern Canada until 2016.

“A combination of factors, including the continued rise of CO2 emissions, could cause a significant portion of the region to remain in subzero weather throughout the coming year,” said a devastated Mark Thompson, head of the MOAA Emergency Response team.

Subzero2Snow removal has been a topic of much discussion and budgetary concern throughout Atlantic Canada. If a spring thaw does not occur, it could spell disaster for some communities.

“Obviously this is going to be a difficult year for everyone,” reassured Saint John Mayor Mel Norton. “We did not budget for an extended winter, but we will be able to partially fund the continued snow removal from the cancellation of the local spring and summer recreational programs. We are also discussing tax incentives for those residents who are able to assist with keeping the streets clear.”

Uptown Saint John resident Rita Hemmings has already started packing her suitcases to move out of the frozen Picture Province to somewhere more temperate. “I’m planning to go live with my sister in the Yukon,” she explained. “From what I hear they get at least a bit of a summer. I’m not spending another minute in this godforsaken wasteland.”

Temperatures are expected to rise marginally over the coming months before dropping again to current levels.

Most scientists remain optimistic that this shift in temperatures will not extend beyond 2016, though some are projecting a 5-year cycle.

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