Ted Flemming and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

Ted Flemming and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

Fredericton — The Minister of Justice Ted Flemming was witnessed having what some could describe as a tantrum when asked to answer questions during Friday’s press conference, but what was not readily apparent was the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day that he had been having up to this point. 

The Manatee’s Investigative Team has been working tirelessly since the press conference to determine the origins of Minister Flemming’s outburst. They were able to uncover the following timeline with the cooperation of Minister Flemming’s team to help justify his reaction to questions being posed to him by the media:

  • 7:45 a.m.: Minister Flemming’s alarm went off, but instead of the radio playing the soft soothing tones of Adele, the local station was sampling Rebecca Black’s “Friday.” This set the day off on the wrong tone.
  • 8 a.m.: Minister Flemming wanted Lucky Charms for breakfast, but his wife had only purchased Corn Flakes. Not good, Nancy, not good.
  • 8:15 a.m.: Minister Flemming drove to the legislature, but again no Adele on the radio. He grumbled that “Capital FM hasn’t been the same since the changeover.”
  • 8:30 a.m.: Minister Flemming had to park farther than usual due to the striking workers being around the legislature. It was too cold for Minister Flemming to break out his ‘”Fancy Crocs,” and therefore his feet were sore by the time he reached his office.
  • 11 a.m.: Minister Flemming’s daily nap was interrupted by the sounds of protesters. “What happened to silent protests?” he mumbled to himself as he sat at his desk.
  • 3:15 p.m.: Minister Flemming attended the 2:45 p.m. press conference with his colleagues, and despite there being a question period for those government members in attendance, he was clearly not informed of this beforehand. Chalk that one up to a poorly timed miscommunication.

In all, Minister Flemming should be forgiven for his outburst during Friday’s press conference. After all, he is not the Minister of Government Transparency (at press time, this role remains vacant with no plans to fill).

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