Fredericton — A Fredericton woman says businesses that only accept cash discriminate against millennials and should therefore be boycotted. She claims she was “turned away” from a local coffee shop that refused to accept her card.
“They did say their debit machine was down temporarily, but still, that’s no excuse,” said 25-year-old Meredith Lee. “I wasn’t allowed to order my cold brew on nitro — it really threw off my whole day.”
Lee quickly brought her laptop to a different coffee shop and began drafting a petition — which has already garnered almost 500 signatures from young New Brunswickers — to force businesses to accept debit and credit, or to close for good.
“It’s 2019, not 2009. We don’t carry cash and it’s not fair to expect us to,” Lee added flippantly. “So yeah, when this happened to me I immediately stopped updating my resumé and got to work on creating this petition. I feel like it’s more important, you know?”
Lee’s friends agreed with her before they knew what her issue was. Once we explained the injustice of cash-only, they agreed even harder.
“Saying ‘cash only’ is basically saying ‘no millennials.’ Have you ever met a person under 40 who carries cash on them? I don’t think so,” said Axel Aaronson, 26, an amateur skateboarder who hangs around downtown. “I’ve been using my mom’s credit card since I was old enough to steal it from her purse, but I don’t think I can withdraw cash with that, can I? I don’t know.”
Business owners are fighting against the petition.
“The reason we’re ‘cash only’ is precisely to keep those whiny fuckers away,” said Boris O’Neill, owner of a nearby barber shop. “They all want the same damn haircut anyway, and they keep asking me to ‘trade’ for it instead of paying at all. This one girl offered me ‘good vibes’ to colour her hair. Another guy said he makes his own vegan muffins and can bring some by next week if I’d be willing to give him a fade. No way — it’s cash or the door.”
Lee and her buddies aren’t sure where to present the petition to get the ball rolling.
“Do I bring this to the premier or something? Who even is the premier now?” she asked. “Like, is it that blonde guy or the old dude? Someone has to do something about this! I’m sick of it!
“It’s just like when someone tries to call you instead of texting. How rude is that?”