New Brunswick — With Justin Trudeau’s resignation as Liberal leader and prime minister on Monday, most Trudeau-hating merchandise businesses are throwing in the towel.
“The rednecks of this country have been keeping me fed and warm for years now,” said one online anti-Trudeau swag purveyor, “but with him gone, I really can’t see my quality products having much of a market. Do you know anyone who’s going to fly upside-down maple leaf flags now? What am I going to do with 50,000 ‘Fuck Trudeau’ bumper stickers?”
An Etsy seller we interviewed said she personally has no political leanings one way or another, but had found success in creating handmade pieces for a wide range of those whose whole lives were dedicated to disliking Justin.
“They love, love calling him ‘Tru-dumb’ or ‘Tru-dope’ — they think it’s the height of humour,” she told us, rolling her eyes. “So I capitalized on that by making pins, socks, bobbleheads, and whatever other crap these dumbos will buy. So yeah, it’s a sad day for me. I don’t think I’ll find another trend as lucrative or as long-lasting as hating on Justin.”
The Manatee spoke with New Brunswick resident Keith Allan, who said he doesn’t know what to feel now that he doesn’t have Trudeau to loathe.
Allan’s home, located in Geary, is fully decked out in what can best be described as a shrine to the former prime minister — hating him, that is. Flags, coffee mugs, apparel, posters — if it says “Fuck Trudeau” on it, Allan has it.
Allan even owns a life-size cardboard cutout of Trudeau, with the eyes crossed out in Sharpie and “I’m a pussy” written in a childish script across the chest.
“Honestly, I’ve kind of gone all in on hating Justin — I don’t wanna say it’s my personality, but I don’t know what’s left when I don’t have that, eh? I’m sure I’ll find someone new to hate, but what if the merch isn’t as cool?”