Moncton — According to multiple reports from members of his online social network, Moncton resident Crispin Dunhill uses Facebook exactly the same way people in the corporate world use LinkedIn.
Dunhill, 32, has been flooding the social media platform with various networking opportunities since he was given a marketing role at InnovAction, a newly formed tech startup in Moncton.
“For the longest time I really thought he was just writing in the wrong browser tab or something,” said former colleague Jeremy Tyler. “He kept talking about his ‘network,’ which I just assumed were his LinkedIn contacts, but now I think he just means anyone he’s ever met.”
Dunhill, whose Facebook profile is officially titled “Crispin Dunhill – Marketing Consultant,” describes himself as a “thought-leader on influencer marketing,” and has allegedly used the word “innovative” — or any of its permutations — in every social media post since 2015.
“Lead your organization to innovative thought-leadership through accelerator management solutions, and make the most of your re-contextualized, actionable content,” Dunhill wrote on Facebook in June, setting his post as public to ensure maximum exposure for his social media metrics.
Dunhill’s social media network, comprised entirely of former coworkers, are reportedly quick to ignore his attempts at networking, as his posts are easily confused with automated ads for business magazines, and his profile photo closely resembles a run-of-the-mill stock image of a mindless corporate cog.
Samantha Gillis, another former coworker, still hears from Dunhill a few times a week — most recently when, on a thread asking her friends about their favourite movies, he chimed in with a list of TED Talk videos.
“He’s the only person I know who invites me to things like lunch-and-learns and webinars instead of parties,” she says. “What is a lunch-and-learn anyway? Why the hell would anyone put those two words together?”
Dunhill, who regularly uses business jargon like “blue-sky thinking” and “opening the kimono,” says social media is an important platform to promote his personal “brand.”
“I keep an Excel spreadsheet with info on all my contacts, including a column for a one-word entry about their personal interests,” he says. “This way I can network on a more personal level, and leverage value-added referral solutions for my friend-clients.”
Dunhill is hoping his position at InnovAction will help pave the way for increased growth among startups in New Brunswick.
“The team and I want the business sector in this province to innovate,” he says. “This involves supporting innovation, and being innovative, and innovating innovatively. I want to make sure that people work as hard as they can, all the time, and never have any fun, because fun isn’t innovative.”
“I haven’t had a day off in 11 years,” he adds.
At press time, InnovAction was finalizing its bankruptcy papers, as the “innovative” and “leading-edge” ideas pitched by Dunhill in his brief tenure have so far cost the small company over a million dollars in lost revenue.