St. Mary's Christmas light display causes massive blackout

Fredericton North — An annual holiday light display caused widespread darkness Monday night. The St. Mary’s First Nation reserve delights locals every year with a dazzling display of houses draped in elaborate Christmas light formations. Families slowly drive up and down the streets at night, marvelling at humanity’s ability to place electronics on a wooden structure in a manner pleasing to the naked eye.

This year was intended to be the biggest and brightest yet, and it was — but at great cost.
At 9:12 p.m. John Paul decided to add one more light-reindeer to his shining front yard, thus creating the straw that broke the camel’s back (or in this case, the reindeer’s). Like an EMP grenade had gone off, a wave of darkness shot out from his house, emanating from that single point and absorbing all light on Fredericton’s north side. Witnesses likened it to the black hole in the recent blockbuster hit Interstellar.

As soon as city police were alerted, they pointed the southside lighthouse beacon at the affected area to provide temporary lighting while NB Power linemen got to work.

“I felt terrible,” bemoaned an embarrassed Paul. “All I wanted was to see the smiles on the faces of those families in their cars as they pump out more carbon dioxide into the atmosphere. I never dreamed that I would be the next Hurricane Arthur.”

Though melodramatic, Paul’s comparison was accurate. Linemen will be working for days to bring power back to Fredericton’s dark side.

An NB Power spokesperson urged the public to truly put others before themselves for once this Christmas by thinking of the consequences of misplaced Christmas spirit.

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