Millville — Local hero Fred Burton celebrated an important milestone last week: not removing his authentic camouflage Alpine baseball cap in 15 years. Burton, a mechanic, said he was proud to receive the key to the town in honour of the momentous anniversary.
“Yup, I had a few moments where I thought I might have to take her off in the shower, but she kind of just absorbed the shampoo and kept us both clean,” explained Burton. “When the mayor told me Millville was celebrating my accomplishment, you could have knocked me over with a feather.”
The grateful Burton wiped a single tear from his eye before hugging his third wife, Tina Mae-Burton, and laughing with sheer joy.
“There were a few times people tried to get me to take my hat off. Church, Christmas, getting my driver’s licence photo… but I just played dumb and they gave up. This hat defines who I am as a person. Now, to see the whole town gathered to celebrate little old me and my hat, that was something special,” said Burton.
Tina Mae-Burton said that the Alpine hat is her husband’s most attractive feature.
“When I met Fred, the first place I looked was at that beautiful cap on that big old head of his. Then he said, ‘Hey, my eyes are down here!’ and I knew he was funny too. What a keeper!” roared Mae-Burton, who met her now-husband when she was a bridesmaid at his second marriage.
“It really is something for our little town to be proud of,” said Millville Mayor Beverley Forbes. “Some critics said it’s ‘rude’ or ‘right greasy,’ but we as a community feel that Fred is a good man with a good fashion sense and he’s just the kind of person we want representing Millville to the world.
“We’re doing our best to spread the word — Millville is home to Fred Burton, the man who, despite all odds and much adversity, hasn’t removed his hat in 15 years!”