Fredericton — Take a stroll around any market, and you’ll see real human design and innovation everywhere.
But many owners of local businesses small and large say they’re tired of the same old human-centric artwork and promotional materials.
“Human ‘art’ is so over,” said food truck restauranteur Jackie Quinn. “We’ve seen it for thousands of years. Cavemen were doing it. But we need artificial intelligence to create that slightly unsettling, mildly creepy kind of image that is usually only found in your nightmares after you take off-brand cold meds.”
Quinn said that after making her first ChatGPT flier, she never looked back.
“I used to just take pictures of my food and write out the specials on Bristol board, and attach it to the side of my truck. Occasionally I’d hire a graphic designer to make a sign advertising the specials.
“Business was booming! But I could tell that people were hungry for something more than my famous burgers. They wanted to see what artificial intelligence could bring to their shopping and dining experience.”
As a vendor at the Garrison Night Market on Thursdays in Fredericton, Quinn said she knows others feel the same way about the prevalence of human-generated art. Our reporter meandered through the busy market to speak with more business owners.
“I make fruity yogurt pops, and they’re only five dollars!” said Andrew Bradley. “There’s no way my human brain could come up with a way to convey that information that would attract customers, the kind of people who like the unnatural colours and images produced by AI. They want to see word vomit all over a small space. They want to see a somewhat cartoonish and sickening picture of pineapple, watermelon and whatever else Claude can dish out.
“I just have to come up with the perfect prompt. That’s enough ‘art’ for me.”
Another vendor said he posts advertisements for his artwork made by AI all around the town, on bulletin boards, bus stops, benches — anywhere they’ll be seen.
“Decades ago I used to manually create paintings, with oil on canvas — can you believe that?” scoffed Gerald Levesque. “But now I can make a picture in seconds. And it’s like nothing you’ve ever seen! People no longer view me as some old guy painting pictures, they see me as an innovator for telling ChatGPT to make something no human mind can summon.
“Yes, the people sometimes have 13 fingers and when you look at it for too long you feel kinda dizzy and uncomfortable, but it’s so quick and cheap. No materials, no brainpower needed! Shop local? More like slop local!”
A rude human being interrupted the interview to comment.
“I actually would rather look at an amateur attempt at a design by a real person,” she said. “All this AI slop looks the same! It’s soulless!”
Our reporter ignored her, as she will surely be left behind with the other humans in the artificial intelligence revolution.