Dieppe — Who needs a car or truck to survive in New Brunswick? Not Nathan Beauparent, a 38-year-old father of 2 from Dieppe. He relies solely on his trusted 3-wheeler, which he calls “Wheels” in homage to his favourite character from the original CBC series Degrassi Junior High.
“Most people gravitated towards Snake or Joey Jeremiah,” scoffed Beauparent while leaning against his Yamaha. “For me though, it’ll always be Wheels — he was boss.”
Beauparent told The Manatee about how he came to his decision not to own a traditional vehicle and have his 850cc Yamaha wheeler street-licensed and used year-round.
“Well, I thought about gettin’ a car,” he recalled. “But then I remembered that I don’t wear dresses. I’m boss, ya see, and to be boss, ya gotta act boss.”
Our reporter asked Beauparent what it means to him to be boss.
“Being boss is simple for me,” he said with a smile cutting across his bearded face. “I don’t have to do much, I just act like me and that’s boss enough. But, if someone like you wanted to be boss, you’d have your work cut out for ya.”
He went on to describe, in detail, the steps required for our reporter to be boss.
“Step 1: Get rid of them fancy buttons on your shirt. I suggest giving the shirt back to your sister, in fact.
“Step 2: Get a wheeler, and I mean a 3-wheeler, too. Not a 4-wheeler like those Marys [Beauparent told our reporter that he uses the term “Mary” to describe “non-boss folks from both genders” and that women can, in fact be boss as well] ride. Can’t be boss if you’re a Mary drivin’ a bike with 4 wheels — might as well get a Porsche and start wearing loafers.”
Beauparent added another 4 steps to his method, each increasingly more derogatory than the one before.
Friends of the local hero confirmed his bossness and told The Manatee that Beauparent rides his wheeler everywhere.
“To the beer store, to the bar, to the brewery,” listed his self-described best friend Amos Kennedy. “Doesn’t matter what the weather is, what’s going on, nothin’. He drives his baby everywhere — even takes his babies on it. He’s really safe about it though; he got some little helmets made for his kids out of an old keg that he had in his garage and some deflated soccer balls.”
Kennedy said he’d be shocked if his friend ever traded in his 3 wheels for 4.
“I don’t see that ever happening,” he speculated. “A boss like Nate don’t stop being boss. Ya know what I mean?”
Our reporter didn’t know what he meant but agreed anyway to avoid another explanation of what it takes to be boss.