Fredericton — With yet another morning of shovelling driveways, cleaning snow off of vehicles and generally just hating nature, residents in the Anglophone West School District are learning that officials apparently won’t be closing schools for snow ever again.
Recently it was reported that New Brunswick students are well below the national average when it comes to instructional hours in the classroom which has led Education Minister Dominic Cardy to get creative with making up the time — by cancelling cancellations altogether.
“Listen, I think these little runts have had it too good for too long under the last administration,” he told The Manatee on Thursday morning from his home office. “It’s almost as if the Gallant government cared more about the safety of children rather than them learning things — and that’s just ridiculous.”
Cardy went on to say that it wasn’t only the kids who have had it too good, but also teachers who “get to sit back, relax, and not have to do the job they’re being paid to do when we get just a little dusting of snow or something. Maybe they should have to work from home like I do when it’s messy outside? There’s an idea — bring all the kids to the teacher’s house on snow days. Problem solved.”
Reactions were mixed when our reporter asked local parents about the lack of snow days this week.
“I’m really happy that they’re finally doing something about the crazy number of snow days,” cheered Amie Young of Fredericton. “My sister is a teacher and it’s so annoying for me to see her not have to go to work all the time.
“Sure, she spends her entire evening every week night planning and cutting things out and marking papers or whatever. And, sure, she has to stay at work late twice a week to direct this stupid play that’s coming up for the kids in her school.
“But still, I want her to have to work her normal hours along with all those extra ones — it’s only fair. Besides, I’m still on vacation this week and if my kids don’t go to school, where do they go? That’s right, they stay home with me — no thanks.”
“It’s amazing to me that they force us to send our children and teachers out in these storms,” complained Bernie Alders, also of Fredericton. “I think teachers should get to stay home and get paid for doing nothing — just like most other people in the province.”