Fredericton — Calm Waters Hot Yoga Studio is now under hot water for their strict policy against hiring anyone born between Nov. 22 and Dec. 23 due to the fact that according to the astrological Zodiac Calendar, anyone born during that time is a “Sagittarius” and not deemed reliable enough for employment.
“We know the capricious nature of Sagittarius, and we don’t hold that against them,” said Calm Waters Hot Yoga Studio owner Starr Wolfprance while softly waving a plume of sandalwood incense in the direction of his nose. “We just feel that this isn’t the right place for their life’s journey.”
According to one shunned potential Sagittarius employee, who said she felt the need to get the word out and let other Sagittari know that the regime-like yoga establishment is blatantly discriminating against people who share and feel personally connected to a Zodiac sign represented by a constellation that apparently resembles a half-man, half-horse archer, “I know that when Neptune becomes in line with Jupiter that I will likely feel the urge to move on, but that’s not for a while. And I would definitely give my 2-week notice.”
However, the Calm Waters Hot Yoga owner disagrees. “She isn’t taking the moon’s participation into account in her future decision-making whatsoever.”