St. Stephen — As soon as his girlfriend has fallen asleep after binge-watching Orange Is the New Black, St. Stephen, N.B. man Tyler Watson, 28, begins messaging friends, acquaintances and even co-workers on Facebook — all of whom just happen to be female and at least moderately attractive.
Watson said he only messages girls he sees as friends, and it’s primarily in the interest of “keeping in touch.” “I send messages, often just a winky-face or something to get things started, to about 25 of my closest female friends. Usually 2 or 3 of ’em get back to me right away,” he explained. “Sometimes I just ‘like’ Instagram photos of them at the beach with their friends. It’s just to keep a little something on the back-burner. It’s perfectly harmless; I probably wouldn’t even care if Alicia saw the messages.”
Alicia Price, Watson’s girlfriend of about 2 years, thinks she’s lucky to have found Watson. “I’m not getting any younger,” said the 27-year-old who could probably have any man — or at least any man in St. Stephen. “He’s always great when we’re together, he’s got a job and he’s decent-looking. Who am I to judge what he does in his spare time?”
“Once you’re in a relationship, a lot of opportunities just close up,” Watson informed a Manatee reporter. “I can’t be on Tinder anymore because her friends would rat me out, and I really can’t go out drinking with the boys without feeling like I’m doing something wrong. I want to keep my name in the dating pool in case things between me and Alicia ever go south.”
A reporter interviewed Carly Robbins, 24, one of the women with whom Watson regularly and harmlessly interacts. “If I get a message at like, 2 a.m., and it’s half-coherent and way too flirty, I know it’s Tyler,” she said, rolling her eyes. “He’s so desperate — and Alicia’s a great girl, so I feel bad for her. Tyler must see himself as some kind of Casanova or some shit. Or maybe he thinks he’s ‘settling’ for Alicia, when in reality she could do way better? Anyway, I just ignore him.”
“Yeah, I’m just not sure I’m ready to settle down with the old ball and chain,” said Watson, as he was “poking” about 6 uninterested women on Facebook at 3:37 a.m. “Alicia can be so jealous and suspicious — it’s really not an attractive trait.”