Fredericton — A new law in New Brunswick prevents people aged 65 or older from operating a motor vehicle in the province on weekdays between the hours of 6 and 9 a.m., and 3 and 5 p.m.
The law was created due to the large number of government workers who are late for work every day and take even longer to get home in the evening. Premier Blaine Higgs announced the change at the legislature Monday morning.
“After all the terrible commutes due to weather over the past few weeks, our eyes have been opened to just how bad traffic and drivers are in New Brunswick, especially in the cities,” said Higgs to a group of reporters who had all shown up to the press release at least 10 minutes late.
“Since seniors seem to be the ones who consistently drive too slow, we’ve decided to not allow them to drive during key rush-hour times. This will prevent tardiness, road rage and traffic accidents. I enjoyed my last few days of driving myself around whenever I wanted, but I can acknowledge that the time has come to get off the roads, for the good of all New Brunswickers,” said Higgs, who turned 65 on March 1.
“It’s especially bad the day after a storm, somehow even worse than the day of a storm,” said Fredericton resident Tammy Clowater.
“It’s like, the roads are all plowed now, the storm is over…Why do you need to drive like a 90-year-old today? During the storm, sure, drive slow if you have to, but that’s it — doesn’t need to be slow every single morning!”
According to Higgs, studies show that seniors are the least likely to obey the rules of the road and pay attention to other drivers, because they feel they’ve had to follow the rules their whole lives and think that it’s time others accommodate them for once.
“You’re goddamn right I’ll drive however I please! If I decide to stop in the middle of the road to see what house number I’m going by, you can just wait a few seconds and be thankful I fought in the war to give you the right to drive at all!” said Percy Wallace, 91.
“You think this new ‘law’ will stop me from driving down to the Legion first thing every morning? You’ll have to pry the steering wheel out of my cold, dead hands — which will be 50 years from now! I’ll outlive you all!”
This has to be fake news!
Surely this is a really bad joke, especially as today’s date is March 4, not April 1.
Is there such a thing to get a part time driver licence and part time licence plates part time insurance , part time inspection to drive from only part time
Right. If people believe this then maybe they shouldn’t be driving lol
What about all the elderly that has to go to work because we don’t get enough pension from our foolish government talk about freedoms we have none
If you think this is true, maybe you shouldn’t be driving either
This is extremely stupid
What a joke this is. Discrimination at its best and all because govt workers are late getting to work and late getting home,the seniors u are discriminating against are the same people that for years travelled these rds every day to go to work and provide for their families and their province as a whole,I think it is time we began to treat our elderly with the dignity and respect they so deserve. Law makers should hang their head and be ashamed of themselves
WTF! Government employees don’t work when they do get to work. Can’t see any measurable loss here….BTW, these are words of cranky old (76 candles on the last B’Cake) Dude who’s been dodging the retards of the road for 6 decades!!
Mel you are absolutely right,I wonder why do they want to retired Elderly people’s ,because life is SO fast in this days maybe We are just trying to slow it down and You don’t like it
Do people in Canada have a problem understanding satire?
What happens if some of these seniors are still working? We all can’t stop working because we turn 65.
i am 75 &still run my one bissnes sold over 300 cars last year i drive 10 miles to work every day old age petison not enufh
Good thing you have employees who know how to spell
75 years old and you can’t even spell simple words right. Maybe you should leave your “bissnes” in more capable hands, Gramps.
This had better be a joke or Blaine Higgs is going to have a lot of very angry senior citizens on his doorstep.
Seniors should be re tested some are still very good drivers and some still don’t know how to drive . My son almost was killed by a high speeding 82 year old who had no control what so ever of her car 100 on a 50 zone and right through an intersection she lived her life my son is only 17 and almost lost his but hey let’s feel sorry for them and put young people at risk you know what’s wrong with this world all you dummies are over educated
Too funny. People really believe your ” news ” ???
Typical government workers late for work.It dam well is not the seniors fault.
So maybe we should drive 15 km over the limit and tailgate . How about giving a few more minutes to get to work idiots.
Also, this is a satirical website :), so not “fake news/propaganda/lies” but comedy.
Jeez, I’m truly amazed at how gullible some people are. It’s an effing joke morons.
If this law was to ever come to pass, how would all the grandchildren get to their different sport and group involvements during their parents workdays…lol.
Discrimination based on age.
maybe young people 16 to 25 should also be banned during certain hours.
the young people speed, talk on cell phones, drive after having drank.
What about the seniors who still work?
Hey who ever brought this to the forefront does not realize that 65 year olds have RIGHTS also !…Some even still work & need to be on the roads at that time as well REMEMBER these 65 plus aged people pay their dues to be on the roads when ever they need to be, that is why they pay for a licences & Insurance ! to be free time drivers…. what’s next ?…..not only 65 plus year olds drive slow , vacationers who do not know the roads also go SLOW .. ….I would rather be 5 minutes plus caught in traffic then flowing with those FAST and furious drivers..This is crazy ….
Opening up quite a can of worms here….. No more senior volunteers, no more meals on wheels, kids to activities, attenting activities they love, paying insurance but not allowed to drive certain hours….????? , What about freedom , …… after paying taxes all our lives……. and I could go on and on
A good first step. I was in Fredericton yesterday and the women drivers from hell where out in full force. Time to get them off the road too!
Satire people satire, check the disclaimer at the bottom of the page
What a bunch of angry gullible people!? If you believe this is real, you probably ACTUALLY should give up driving…..
This is what happens when you have idiots running your province
I just moved here and things like this will definitely get me thinking
Please, move back to where you came from LOL
C est qui la gagne b esclave qui vote des loie de marde de même
Why am I not surprised that there are this many New Brunswickers that fail to pick up on blatant satire
the use of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule to expose and criticize people’s stupidity or vices, particularly in the context of contemporary politics and other topical issues.
Living In Ontario I guess I will never visit New Brunswick, So now I will go around it. TOO BAD
Tell the government workers to get up 15 minutes earlier and they won’t be late fuckin dummies. And tell Higgs 1 less vote for him
I’m dying reading some of these comments!….. People will believe anything they read on social media???
I am Curious to know. How old are You.
I serviced provincial and federal civil servants throughout my career. They are the laziest and most corrupt group of employees in Canada.