Saint John — Cannabis has been legalized in Canada for a full year, and New Brunswickers are celebrating the milestone by continuing to stay away from Cannabis NB stores, both in person and online.
“Wow, a year already since this country legalized it!” exclaimed pot-smoker Trent Sawyer of uptown Saint John. “Time flies when you’re doing the exact same thing you were always doing — which in my case is buying high-quality marijuana from my dealer for a good price.
“I still either get it from Matt, or from some other dirtbag down the street,” continued Sawyer. “Way easier, cheaper, and just the best bang for your buck. But I guess it’s dope that it’s been legal for 12 months. That’s kinda cool! Happy birthday to those big, empty stores!”
The Crown corporation lost money in its first year, and endured endless problems such as lack of supply, high prices, poor selection, complaints about the wastefulness of packaging, questions around payment for execs, data privacy and more.
New Brunswick residents are getting high on their own supply to mark the anniversary.
“I’m totally baked, man,” said drug dealer Sandra Paul of northside Fredericton, rolling a fat joint in her living room. “Anyways, never been to one of those Cannabis NB stores, but I heard it’s pretty lame in there. I don’t want them knowing my name or where I live or anything, so I just grow it at home with seeds I ordered online, and sell it to everyone in the neighbourhood.
“Has it been a year already since the government thought they could do a job meant for me and my friends? Weird. My sales actually went way up this past year. Guess no one’s buying from The Man.”
Others say the stores are useless, but harmless.
“If they made it a year, they can probably make it two years, maybe even three,” said Monctonian Sam LeBlanc. “Will I ever buy from them? No, but it’s not like I mind if they want to keep doin’ their thing. More power to ’em.”
Cannabis NB, for their part, say that if they learned anything in their first year of business, it’s that they should probably hire some Islanders as consultants.