Woman can’t stop waking up in unprecedented times

Woman can’t stop waking up in unprecedented times

New Brunswick — Local woman Erin MacKenzie has once again, to her dismay, woken up in unprecedented times.

“I guess it’s just my internal clock getting into the wrong rhythm, but my body keeps waking me up in these damn unprecedented times! It’s kind of like naturally waking up early on Saturday morning, but, you know, way worse. This had better not become my new normal.”

MacKenzie said it doesn’t help that each day her email inbox is packed with reminders of these unprecedented times we’re all waking up in each day.

“I got one from the CEO of Superstore reminding us to wear a mask in these unprecedented times. A sleep mask does help a bit, but not enough to fully shake this thing. Is there a way to just hit snooze till 2021?”

All weekend, even though it was Thanksgiving, MacKenzie continued to wake up in unprecedented times.

“I thought turkey was supposed to make you sleep…some chemical in the skin or something like that? I was hoping to pass out and wake up at a regular time, or a normal time, but nope — each day it’s the same thing.

“I have chamomile or lavender tea every night, don’t bring devices into my bedroom, shut off the TV by 9 p.m., sometimes pop a melatonin, but I can’t seem to stop waking up in unprecedented times. Any ideas?”

Our reporter, unfortunately, had no useful suggestions, because we’re all in this together.


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