Fredericton pedestrian struck by police, charged with obstruction of justice

Fredericton — A pedestrian in Fredericton who was struck by an on-duty police officer over the weekend has been formally charged with obstruction of justice.

The on-foot civilian interfered with official police business at a marked crosswalk (with flashing lights and the whole shebang) in the downtown area on Saturday evening at approximately 10 p.m., said spokesperson Allison Lessmanor.

The officer driving the vehicle was inconvenienced for a full 30 minutes while he waited for an ambulance to arrive. Paramedics claimed that the criminal had “very minor injuries,” but a major case of the “fakeys,” which is Internet lingo meaning something that is not true.

Speed was not a factor, but priority was; the officer was on his way to scope out some sketchy-looking teenagers who had parked their cars outside the Dollarama on Smythe Street and were apparently standing around loitering.

“The officer is a member of the Fredericton Daily News Facebook group,” said Lessmanor. “It has more than 4,000 members and it’s a closed group, meaning you have to be approved by a member to join. We’re not talking small potatoes here; small town, but most certainly not small potatoes. Someone posted that teenagers were causing problems around the Dollarama, laughing too loud, staring at people. You must understand, it shook our officer to his core — it’s only natural he was distracted while on his way to the scene.”

The investigation is ongoing, but according to Lessmanor, there is no question of the suspect’s guilt.

“The officer who hit the pedestrian was delayed by 30 minutes. In that time, those teenagers could have littered, twerked, vaped, or worse. This would have been totally unacceptable. The suspect in question was acting selfishly. Under different circumstances, I would say they deserved to get hit by a car, but our officers are busy and have no time to run you down.”

The name of the officer whose quest for justice was temporarily impeded has not been released. While it is unknown whether they are still on active duty, one thing is certain… automobile-impaired people need to stay out of the way of justice.


  1. Protect & serve, indeed! This wouldn’t be the most foolish thing I’ve heard our police do!

  2. Disrepectful! Our men and woman in uniform are here to help and their lives on the line! They would never do this but if they did there would be a reason. Lots of drunks downtown on wkds not respecting rules of the road.

    • I totes agree. If you get in a cop’s way they should totally be able to run you down and charge you for it. I mean their jobs are super challenging, they shouldn’t have to follow the same laws as everyone else. That would just be chaos.

  3. The officer who hit the pedestrian is probably killing himself with guilt!!! Reading this sort of thing really angers me. I like humour as much as anyone but this is no joke! The officer could come down with PTSD, anyone can make the mistake of hitting a pedestrian the author of this “article” of the site manager aren’t perfect people!!! I hope the Fredericton police get wind of this and put you scoundrels in your place …… there are ought to be laws against spreading this sort of tripe against people who put their lives on the line to protect us ungrateful children

  4. stop sympathizing with the Fredericton police, we all got hard jobs big deal. He wouldn’t give a shit if you fucked up
    He would arrest you. The FPD harrass and discriminate everyday, so a little shaming might be good for the rotten pricks.

  5. The person who posted this is absolutely crazy. “Quest for justice” and oh my god they could have twerked and vaped????? Get a grip.


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