Woodstock — High school sweethearts Kathy and Devon McKinnon have been together for more than 6 years, and are anxiously awaiting the birth of their first child. Agreeing on a name was easy: Shelly, if it’s a girl, and Matthew, if it’s a boy.
From the outside looking in, one would assume that the McKinnons have the perfect relationship — and in many ways that assumption would be right. But, behind the thin veneer of their pleasant middle-class lifestyle, there rests a private and bitter feud.
“She absolutely refuses to put milk in our Kraft Dinner,” Devon said candidly. “Not once. Not ever — not even on my birthday.”
“The Milk Problem,” as it has come to be known, has plagued many Canadian couples, but none so much as the McKinnons, who both profess that the packaged macaroni and cheese is their favourite meal substitute.
“I’ve rearranged my whole life for him,” said Kathy, “but I’m not about change my Kraft Dinner recipe for any man.” She said that her biggest issue with adding milk to her KD is that the “soupy liquid” dilutes the ketchup.
“Ketchup! She actually puts ketchup on her Kraft Dinner!” Devon exclaimed. “If you were supposed to use ketchup, they would give you some — do you see any packets in this box?”
“No, but it doesn’t come with milk creamers either, now does it?” Kathy retorted.
The couple told Manatee reporters that this is not a simple lovers’ tiff. They said it raises some serious questions about how will they raise their children.
“I wouldn’t do that to them. I would never force dry, slimy Kraft Dinner down my child’s throat,” said Devon, wiping a tear from his eye. “I won’t … I can’t. I can’t do it.”
But Kathy remains adamant. “I was raised in a milk-less KD home, and I will raise my children in a milk-less KD home,” she affirmed, angrily stirring ketchup into a fresh bowl of dry Kraft Diner. “Either with or without him.”