Fredericton — A controversial new study has ruffled the feathers of engineering and business grads everywhere, as results have proved definitively that arts majors are the most common to be employed in their field.
The study found that an astounding 89 per cent of bachelor of arts graduates in New Brunswick earn their paycheques by working in their field, and while a small percentage of those include historians, teachers and journalists, the overwhelming majority list their employment as “government artists.”
“Seasonally, I’m a lawn care technician,” Arthur Fahrtsy told The Manatee, “but that’s not how I identify myself.”
Fahrtsy, a 2010 arts graduate from the University of New Brunswick, is preparing for his ninth winter as a government artist.
“It’s a tough gig sometimes,” Fahrtsy admits, explaining how his girlfriend is a nurse and therefore works year-round. “I’m home alone a lot, and so on top of being an artist, I’m expected to do things like shovel the driveway and fold laundry. It really cuts into my meme-crafting time, and honestly, it’s exhausting.”
Fahrtsy, now coming up on a decade of “government employment,” expressed his disdain for the “working conditions.”
“We really should be part of a union or something. It’s going to be tough to save for retirement this way.”
Our reporter proceeded to ask the government artist a series of hard-hitting questions, including:
-Have you considered getting a specialized degree in hopes of finding full-time work?
-Do you ever plan on looking for work through the winter months?
-Do you feel that taking advantage of E.I. reflects poorly on those who genuinely require the program?
-Will you continue to collect E.I. in the years to come?
-When’s the last time you left your house?
His answers, in order, were, “No, no, no, yes, no.”