Ottawa — The number of truckers at the Freedom Convoy protest grew exponentially today as tens of thousands representing the other 90 per cent of the trucking industry drove into Ottawa.
However, they did not arrive to join the protest. These fully vaccinated truckers, emblematic of the vast majority of their industry, showed up to collect their colleagues and then return back home to work.
“Sorry we’re late,” said 48-year-old New Brunswicker Sammy Remorque. “We were working…you know, at our trucker jobs. Not sitting around blaring our horns in the middle of a city like a bunch of assholes. We were actually being truckers.
“We want to take a moment to apologize for our co-workers…emphasis on co-workers, not friends. These people don’t speak for us and I wish they’d stop saying they do. They are giving truckers a bad name.
“Truckers are just like you,” explained Remorque. “Almost 90 per cent of us are vaccinated, just like everyone in every other industry. Yeah, there’s always going to be that 10 per cent of fringe weirdos that you can’t talk to about anything. But that has nothing to do specifically with truckers.”
Once they disembarked from their vehicles, the vaxxed truckers starting mixing with the protest crowd attempting to lure them into their trailers.
“Hey, did you hear they have free Alpine in that trailer? Free piss jugs too, I shit you not! Justin Trudeau is personally handing them out. No, seriously! And, you get to throw the piss jug at him when it’s full! Come on!”
The protesters will be dropped off at their homes or parents’ house with a responsible adult, and probably be grounded.
Fake news, but it’s cute that you think you are a journalist.